Good Bye, Jakarta

The J-town, the big city that I have never wanted to live in. I just didn’t think it’s the right place for me. Well, under one or two personal circumstances, I decided to move in. Entered this city with all the promises, the trust, the happiness that I thought will last forever (shoot! I feel stupid now :D), the first 2 months were as sweet as honey. Then that storm was striking me so hard right to the head. I didn’t know how to describe this one. Another surprise, I had to deal with a cheater on my own, the one thing that I mostly avoid in my life. Well, I could say that my life was over at that time. I wasn’t as strong as I thought. I thought that I was independent enough, none. I thought that I was logical enough, failed. I thought that I trust the right person, totally wrong! At that time, I felt that i learn nothing for my whole life, I felt stupid.

It wasn’t easy for me, definitely not easy. Facing the fact that I gave up everything, my dream, my believe, my money, and any other things, it turned out that I had nothing. Nothing. Not even a friend.

Well, I felt sad, betrayed, cheated, alright. Then what? Until when? A thought has came through my mind, that this is the risk I had chosen. No matter how hard I defend myself, no matter how strong I blame someone, this is my risk. And I had to deal with it, there’s no other choices. No matter how pushy I tried to find the answer of ‘why this is happening to me’ or ‘what did you do behind me’, I realize that I would never get the answer when the time is not right. I had my sad moment, yes. But I also have a life to deal with. I just need to accept it, stop asking, forgive myself, and re-arrange my future plan. I can simply smile or laugh about it now, but those 3 recovery months were tough. Very tough, I couldn’t walk or run, I crawled. Thank you my homeboys for always be there for me, supporting me, eventhough we’re miles away.

In the other hand, Jakarta has filled me with working environment. I started my career as a recruiter & administration in a multinational company. I’m pretty content recalling that I have passed that rough time without affecting my professional life. Beside providing new experiences, my job has been becoming my getaway where I could put aside all the hatred and angry feeling that definitely unhealthy for me. I’m so grateful for the best colleagues in Appco. 1 year and 3 months together with you all has coloured my life and bring it to a new level. Thank you Jakarta for making me tough, teaching me about how to value trust, training me to be communicative, and of course, conveying new perceptions. Although I have no any plan yet to come back and stay, I think I’ll still be around to transit, like usual. But for now, all I can say is goodbye.

"I'm a young soul in this very strange world, hoping I could learn a bit bout what is true and fake. But why all this hate try to communicate, finding trust and love is not always easy to make" Yael Naim - New Soul